I Want a Blank Space, Baby...

Have you ever been inspired by art? I'm talking about being inspired beyond a few fleeting thoughts or feelings. Have you been inspired to actually go out and do something after seeing a work of art? I can now say that I have. Which makes me vastly more cultured and sophisticated than I was last week. I am all about self improvement, in case you can’t tell.

We all (should) know that every app, business, website, and government entity is compiling data on everything about us. It should terrify us, but most everyone looks the other way. If the rumors are true, somebody out there is spending wild amounts of money for our data. When the dollar becomes overinflated into oblivion, I’m willing to bet data will become our new currency. The crazy part is most of us generate data and just give it away! But that’s a topic for another day…

An artist named Simon Weckert has a lot of thoughts about data, the way it’s used, and the way it shapes our world in real time. So he decided to throw a wrench into the works and watch the world burn. This hero bought 99 cell phones and fired up Google Maps on them all. Then he decided to stick them in a Radio Flyer and go for a stroll around his town. As a result, Google’s algorithms thought there was a traffic jam everywhere he walked and routed drivers around the imaginary traffic jam. Hilariously and ironically creating traffic jams in other parts of town.

Wicker’s genius work inspired me to (try to) do a bit of work myself. You see, my wife holds a computer science degree from a college that would have tossed my pathetic application in the trash and set it ablaze. These days she’s a software engineer working on insanely complex software projects I can hardly wrap my brain around. I spent the better part of a weekend trying to convince her that her next interesting project should be to build me an iPhone app that would multiply my digital footprint in Waze or Google Maps. A factor of 97 or so is the magic number, I argued.

Why? Because an app like this would give me a blank space on the roads of the world. A blank space allowing me to rip that sweet, smooth tarmac on my bike in a blissful, car free bubble. I would pay absolutely offensive money for this quasi-clandestine app, but alas, I am a man with many expensive vices and few resources. My genius idea, inspired by the artistic genius of Simon Weckert, caught my wife’s attention for about nine seconds. After which I got a fairly long, boring lecture about data ethics and how she would probably lose her job when I got caught. Lame.

Our cellphones generate the data that powers the nifty light-up signs on the highway, telling us how many excruciating minutes we can expect to spend driving to the next exit. Waze users share speed trap locations, construction zones, routes around tolls, and even gas prices. We put a lot of blind trust in each other when you think about it. But then again, the roads of the world are a few painted lines and generally accepted "rules" away from anarchy.

Since I don't have access to an app that manipulates traffic to the whims of my cycling addiction, I'll stick to riding just after the sun comes up. That is unless, you'd like to hear my app pitch?