Let's Be Wheel

Wheels.  Rims.  Dubs.  Shoes.  Whatever you want to call them…The things attached to your car, wrapped in tires, are the most common part to be upgraded/swapped/customized/whatever’ed.  In the 1980’s, 14 inch or 15 inch wheels were standard across the board.  By the naughty ‘aughts things had changed drastically.  “Dubs” (20 inch, flashy, aftermarket whatever you want to call thems) was a sign of excess money and lack of taste. We've reeled it in these days, but it seems like every new car has multiple wheel options. Different sizes, colors, and spoke patterns...custom wheels from the factory, in a sense. Something for everyone, right?  

Here's the problem though. Hot take incoming...

Every manufacturer's wheels suck, except BMW's. 

There’s no denying that Bavaria has been churning out bloated, pig nosed, overweight cars for far too long.  As a BMW Fanboi, it’s embarrassing.  While BMW's design studio is in a slump, their wheel design department has more hits than Taylor Swift and the Beatles...combined.  No other manufacturer even comes close.  It seems that BMW is so busy churning out banger after banger that they don’t have time to name them.  Instead they do the most German thing ever, they number them!  

In fact, BMW’s wheels are so good that the most common wheels swapped onto a BMW are other BMW wheels.  Thanks to BMW keeping the same 5 x 120mm bolt pattern forever, more or less, it’s usually a breeze.  It’s actually weird to see aftermarket wheels on BMW’s.  But enough jibber jabber, let’s make a believer out of you.  

The 5-series built between 1997 and 2003 was, at the time, the highest rated car by Consumer Reports in history.  Despite the youngest 4th generation (a.k.a. e39 chassis) 5er now of legal age, it’s suspension is still used as a benchmark today.  Like it’s suspension, e39 wheels are also hall of fame caliber.  The Style 5 is a classic split spoke, two piece number coming in at a goldilocks 17 inch diameter.  I swear I’ve seen more 1988 M5’s shod with these bad boys from the late 90’s than the cars they actually came on.  The Style 42, while similar to the Style 5, has a more modern look and is also incredible.  I could write novel waxing poetic about the brilliance of the e39 M5, I'll save it for another post, but I’m pretty sure it’s Style 65 wheels single handedly launched the gunmetal/blacked out wheel trend with a restraint all manufacturers need to re-visit. 

The e39’s predecessor, the e34 5-series, didn’t mess around when it came to wheels either.  The Style 37 wheels are so damn good they came on countless BMW’s.  One of the few BMW wheels blessed with a name, “M Parallel” wheels come in enough offsets that they seem to fit almost any BMW.  Even my own 1988 M3.  For the noncommittal ones reading this, there is the “M-System” wheel.  With some parts hunting you can literally have three, yes three, sets of wheels in one.  While the “Turbine” and “Throwing Star” covers look badass with these wheels, you can also rock them naked and nobody would think you’re crazy.  I’m yet to see another manufacturer pull off this feat.  

If we go back in time further, the M1 designed by the legendary Giorgetto Giugiaro, wears some of the finest of the fine.  While a German car, the M1 was shod with slotted, avant guard looking wheels made in Italy by Campagnolo.  Despite their design coming out of left field, they have aged gracefully.  Many aftermarket wheel companies have M1 Homage wheels, custom built to your specifications.  If I could afford the real deal or even custom homages, you bet I’d have a set on my M3.

Then there are the wheels designed by BMW's little helper...Alpina. This outside turned in-house tuner has been cranking out low numbers of handmade, higher performance, higher luxury BMW's since 1962. Their wheel game is unparalleled. While their cars have changed drastically, their wheels have evolved and kept their trademark multi spoke design. Some even hide the tire valve in the center of the wheel behind the center cap. Air from the valve is ducted through a hollow spoke and into the tire. Genius.

BMW's "M Performance" wheels keep the hit parade rolling in the factory accessory department. Just look at the "Frozen Gold" look of the Style 763M's or that three dimensional spoke of the Style 863M. We also need to take a minute and appreciate how the wheel bolts are placed between the spokes rather than through them. Sex on wheels? These wheels are sex!

While many manufacturers have a few hits, nobody even comes close to the king of factory wheels. General Motors had hits with the Pontiac 8-Lugs as well as the Knock Off's and Rally Wheels found on Mid-Year Corvettes. Jeep had some classics while owned by the under-appreciated geniuses of AMC. Mercedes-Benz AMG Monoblocks weigh a ton, but damn they're worth the look. They all have in common the same thing as your favorite Dad Rock band...They had a great run, but the rest of their stuff sucks.

If I continue this post much longer, and believe me I could, this would become a dissertation for my PhD in BMW history. BMW has the best wheel game in the business. I will die on this hill.